Well thanks to the magic that is Orange Wednesdays, I have a surprise for you guys & girl, I not only have a ‘Superman Returns’ review for you (yes I didn’t lie!) but also a review of the new Kid spy adventure thingie-what ‘Stormbreaker’! Amazing!

Superman Returns
Well, they said Superman could never be brought back to film, and they were right, I mean wrong, uh sorry. The saddest thing about this film is that it gets rid of the Superman III and Superman IV films history, I don’t exactly know what difference it makes, but it’s most likely something big, like Clark Kent dying or something.

The view was spoiled by 2 chavs the other side of the auditorium who insisted on jumping over their seats and going for popcorn every 56 seconds, and the fact that we had to watch the film from the most obscure angle possible thanks to the fact some girl had decided to put her feet up in the arm rest of the seats I wanted to go into.

Is it a DVD film? yes, Superman Returns is a fantastic film! Everyone in this film was great and there was no bad acting, it was very well written, very well put together motion picture. The CGI effects did not take over, though some bits were a bit obvious, “Ooh I wonder if Superman will now swoop in and save the day? Yes yes he will.”.

I look forward to the sequel!!! Superman II?

Stormbreaker
OK for our second treat, Stormbreaker, this started off pretty slowly, when I saw the caption “ISLE OF MAN FILM” I told my fellow cinema-goers that “We should leave…now.” - but it turns out, the Isle of Man does have a reasonably good film industry. The supposedly 14 year old Alex Rid3r has been being trained by his always absent uncle to take over the world or something, and Alex must save the world from a bullied American psycopath, who is sooo not Lex Luthor.

This American has created the worlds createst computer, with the worlds coolest everything just so he can kill every british schoolchild in existence. The prime minister, Tony “Hagrid” Blair, is played by Robbie Coltrane, who I think we’ll all agree, is a perfect choice for our charming, jolly overweight prime minister.

The movie is slightly spoilt by the use of product placement, and that smoke screen sooo came from the vent below the PSP. Apparently Mario Cart is a game, well what do you know?

I’d say 85% of the actors could act, which is always good. A DVD film? No.

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